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Know when to back off

Unfortunately my plans have been put on hold. After some intense lower back pain I’ve been forced to put my working out on hold. The only thing I can really do right now is walk around and some mild yoga. Although on Saturday I pushed a little too hard even at yoga and ended up in paralyzing pain. So, something to keep in mind, when you feel like you’ve tweaked something or when you’re so sore you can barely move, take a day or two off… After 2 or 3 days of working out I could barely move, and instead of taking a day off I pushed forward, and in doing so tweaked my back. I went to do some lifting and my body was so sore that I couldn’t safely lift above my head. So- lesson learned.

I started reading Unbearable Lightness by Portia de Rossi and it is a great book so far. Only at chapter 6, but it really explains what goes through your head when you’re constantly concerned with food, as an anorexic, bulimic, obsessive or observant. She did an amazing job telling the story that captivates you and really brings you to understand how the disease can take hold of someone. However it has also shown me that I walk a very fine line between trying to lose weight and obsession with food. It makes me not want to count every calorie, because that is an easy way to become obsessed, and knowing I became obsessed before makes me definitely not want to again. Unfortunately, as I explained to my cousin when she asked why I track every calorie, my response was because I know it works… So now I’m on a mission to find another option. Because even though I know it works doesn’t mean its right, as with Portia’s story of the 1000kilojoule diet (300 calories) She knew it worked after doing it many times in the past, but that definitely doesn’t mean it is right.

As for everything else, it seems to be going well. I feel I’m doing pretty well keeping myself together. Still no bites on the revamped resume, but I’m hopeful that something will catch soon. One other thing- thinking back to working at Disney. I feel I didn’t get the most out of my Disney opportunity. While at the college program I didn’t take any of the classes and did very little of the extra curricular opportunities. Now, some things I can’t do over, seeing as I don’t still work there, however I can still get some stuff out of it. I looked up the curriculum for the classes I didn’t go to and wrote down all of the books that were required and recommended reading. So I am going to read those. It will allow me to get a little more out of my Disney college program experience. I’m kind of excited. There were always a few of those books I wanted to read back then but once I left I couldn’t every find out what they were, well I was going through my old emails from Disney and found the website that told me! I was so excited! As soon as I’m done with Unforgettable Lightness I will start on one of those!

On tap today- rest my back! Ice and Heat in intervals, plus regular motrin 800! And while I’m sitting here relaxing my back, I might as well apply for as many jobs as possible!

Wish me luck!

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