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Learning to Push

So yesterday was a rough day as I had said before, although it wasn’t as bad as I had expected. Calorie was I was only at about 1600, which isn’t bad considering I though I was going to be closer to 1800. I didn’t hit any of my bodybugg goals but seeing as my back was in immense pain I didn’t do much of anything yesterday, so that was kind of expected. I did get some reading in, and I did reshape my nails (although gave up on polishing them). And I did apply for something like 7 more jobs.

Today I have already applied for another 5, and this is where the learning to push comes into play. Day after day of applying for new jobs starts off with such promise. But after 2 and a half months of it, you start to feel beyond discouraged. At that point is where it is hard to keep going, hard to push forward. You start feeling like you’re destined to stay where you’re at regardless of how unhappy you are there. Depressing is the only word I can think to describe how you feel. It almost feels like with every resume you send out, its one more person saying, nope sorry you’re not good enough. That can be really really hard to overcome. It doesn’t matter how many people tell you how great you are, or how perfectly you fit that job description, you have just 15-30 seconds to make that first impression. No pressure guys! At this point I want to give up. I know I can’t if I want to retain any sibilance of sanity… So I keep pushing forward, hoping, trying, praying that I will be able to find just that 1 company, to give me a chance.

As for the healthy eating, today was much better. I’m at about 1550 projected calories for the day, which is perfect. My ratios are right where I want them. As for a workout, I know I need to get one in today, and I will. But I’m just not sure how hard I will be able to push. My back is still a little sore depending how I move. Not nearly as bad as yesterday, so we’ll see what happens. The goal is to double up since I missed yesterdays and do intense cardio (fire 60) and lifting (push circuit 2). I’m hoping since its push 2 which only does 1 muscle group at a time that my back will be able to handle it. I think the cardio will be fine as long as I don’t try to over do it by kicking too high or punching too hard. Either way though, I do want to hit all of my bodybugg goals for the day. (burn 2050 calories, 8000 steps, 30 mins moderate exercise and 15 mins vigorous exercise)

Wish me luck!

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